The Three Ages Of The Lord Of The Rings

The Lord of the Rings is regularly voted as being one of the favourite books of all times by readers all over the world, but it has dominated the fantasy world in all its major incarnations (we're going to ignore Ralph Bakshi''s cartoon because the saga was not finished in that format and because we want to).

The Book

JRR Tolkein's book is a mammoth undertaking in the reading just from its sheer size, but it gets harder and harder the closer towards the end that you get. What starts off as a fairly clean romp through a thoroughly detailed imaginary world with likeable characters (Tom Bombadil aside) gets darker and darker as the characters all descend into their own personal hearts of darkness. Nobody returns from this particular saga (assuming that they return at all) untouched by the darkness and the evil that is portrayed.

The scale is epic and the story splinters with the major characters going off in all directions and encountering so many minor characters that you need to be committed to the reading to keep them all straight.

The writing also becomes less clean and narratively pleasing as Tolkein's style becomes more flowery and even pretentious as he becomes more and more overcome by the gravitas of the story that he is portraying. By the end of the mammoth tome don't be surprised if you're skimming whole sections looking for the continuation of the story rather than huge chunks of description and increasingly tedious elven songs.

By this point, however, you're hooked and need to get through to the end to find out what happens, so you will keep going no matter what.

At risk of being controversial, the Lord of the Rings is not the greatest book ever written, but it might possibly be the best story ever told and that story is the secret of the book's successs, popularity and longevity.

The Radio Show

In 1981, the BBC produced a 26 part dramatisation the saga that is one of the few radio productions that any fan of science fiction and fantasy should own (The Hitch Hiker's Guide To The Galaxy and Orson Welles' production of The War Of The Worlds being amongst the others). With the likes of Ian Holm as Frodo, Michael Hordern as Gandalf, John Le Mesurier as Bilbo, Simon Cadell, Sonia Fraser, David Collings, Peter Vaughan and many other familiar UK names amongst the impressive voice cast the performances are excellent to brilliant (Peter Woodthorpe's Gollum) and they have a script to serve them in Brian Sibley and Michael Bakewell's adaptation.

The characters are well rounded, the action is stupendously created despite the lack of visuals and some of the sequences bring chills to the heart even now.

Every aspect of the production is given the benefit of the BBC's undeniable expertise and this was the absolute definitive version of the tale until

The Films

Peter Jackson would have been nobody's first choice as director of the film trilogy if asked before the release of The Fellowship of the Rings in 2001, which just goes to show how nobody knows anything in the film business because the the trilogy complete by The Two Towers and The Return of the King is the ultimate in cinematic fantasy. No attempt to capture fantasy on the big screen before or, crucially, since has even come close to matching Jackson's films for imagination, scale, scope, drama, action, character or acting.

With a cast that beats even the BBC radio version including Elijah Wood, Ian McKellan, Christopher Lee, Viggo Mortensen, Cate Blanchett and Ian Holm (though as Bilbo now rather than Frodo) for stellar names and all of them perfectly cast, the heart and the soul of the movies are assured. Onto that human element is heaped huge action sequences, CGI creatures that are flawlessly integrated into the whole and sweeping vistas of New Zealand, effortlessly doubling as the worlds of Middle Earth.

Though Jackson's films play around with the plot of the book, every change is justifiable and improves the flow of the story which combines the huge scope of the war that encompasses whole nations and the intimacy of two friends on a quest that will threaten their very souls.


Whether you're reading, watching or listening to The Lord Of The Rings the one thing that you can be assured of is that you are experiencing the greatest fantasy story ever told in the best example of the media involved.

The Lord Of The Rings truly is the one ring to rule them all.

Kevin McCarthy Dies

Kevin McCarthy, the star of INVASION OF THE BODYSNATCHERS has died and we just wanted to mark his passing with a short word on the film that we most know him for even though he had an extensive list of film, TV and theatre credits to his name.

INVASION OF THE BODYSNATCHERS is the ultimate 50s communist paranoia movie in which the emotionless alien invaders take over the bodies of the folk of a  small town, but leave the soul behind, stifling creativity, individuality and all that is best in humanity in the process. A small group fight against the takeover, but find that the increasing tide against them.

It's a marvellous film and the best telling of the story despite having been remade for the cinema 3 times and had one recent television version.

McCarthy's part in the film is pivotal to creating the unsettling of the audience as it is through him that the paranoia increases throughout the film. A lesser performance could have undermined the effect of the film.

The original ending (not the tacked on 'happy' one) of McCarthy screaming at uninterested motorists that 'You're next!' is one of the most enduring moments in science fiction history.

F - New British horror gets premier at Frightfest

Frightfest is the place to see horror movies in the UK for the first time and F is a perfect example of that. Getting its world premier at the festival the synopsis goes something like this -

"F tells the story of Robert Andeson, a burned-out alcoholic world-wearty English teacher, a man who has to face this most terrifying demons. F is set in a huge, sprawling UK comprehensive school, after lessons have finished for the day. What is a place of learning during the daytime becomes a vast and deserted labyrinthine nightmare of endless corridors, empty classrooms, woodwork rooms, gyms, welding rooms, motor pool shops, canteens, photographic darkrooms, art studion and sports halls. The school comes under relentless attack from a group of bloodthirsty hoodies, intent on only one thing, to spread terror. Anderson must battle these brutal killers, and his deepest fears, in a desperate battle for the survival of his pupils, fellow teachers and those he holds most dear.

F will be released nationwide from September 17th courtesy of Optimum Releasing."

We don't normally cover non-supernatural horror here, but we like to support British film-making when we can.

Sci Fi Totty - A Genre's Shame

There can be little more schizophrenic than the science fiction genre's depiction of women. On the one hand the genre was amongst the first to show women as being intelligent and capable whilst on the other it saddled them with ridiculous outfits that made the most of their outstanding assets.

Just think of the original outfits that the crew of the Starship Enterprise wore in the original STAR TREK. Could those skirts have been any shorter? Is that what Starfleet considers to be practical spacewear? And yet the show had a string of capable women from Nurse Chapel and Lt Uhura through to the subject specialists that appeared.

In THE DAY THE EARTH STOOD STILL, Patricia Neal was a single mother completely in command of her situation, but Anne Francis in FORBIDDEN PLANET had another of those ridiculously short skirts to deal with. Faith Domergue was one of the world's leading scientists in THIS ISLAND EARTH Julia Adams was a top scientist in THE CREATURE FROM THE BLACK LAGOON, but her main contribution was to swim about in a one-piece swimsuit.

That reference is apt because the reason for this speculation is the release in the UK of PIRANHA 3D, which again goes all schizophrenic. It features a female sheriff heroine who is as good as any man, but has so many scantily and unclad females as to completely spoil the effect. Hell, even Ripley, the ultimate science fiction heroine got down to her skivvies in ALIEN.

Alice, the genetic killing machine in RESIDENT EVIL, is as competent a woman as it gets, surviving when all the men around her are killed off, but even she had to be seen being 'born' naked.

The there's Stella Starr, who saves the universe no less in STARCRASH, but she does it in the skimpiest of outfits. Princess Leia led the rebellion against the empire, but she had to sport a gold bikini when necessary.

It seems that no matter how much the genre tries to show women in a positive light, there's always someone who wants to put them in their underwear instead.

Piranha 3-D
Forbidden Planet [Blu-ray]
Resident Evil - The High-Definition Trilogy (Resident Evil/ Resident Evil: Apocalypse/ Resident Evil: Extinction) [Blu-ray]
Creature From the Black Lagoon (Universal Studios Classic Monster Collection)
Starcrash (Roger Corman Cult Classics) [Blu-ray]
The Day the Earth Stood Still
This Island Earth

Style Over Substance?

Just the other night I got the chance to see SCOTT PILGRIM vs THE WORLD and had a thoroughly good time thank you very much. It is very funny, nicely played, has lots of visual gags and tons of cinematic creativity.

What it doesn't do is make any sense. This is a film where the story isn't the thing. To keep dating the girl of his dreams Scott Pilgrim needs to defeat her seven evil exes. Why? Because it's a fun idea. This is not reality. This couldn't possibly happen. This isn't meant to be taken seriously. It's a fun ride rather than a true film.

Kids today spend more time on computer games than going to the pictures and they are now the mass entertainment market of choice. That SCOTT PILGRIM vs THE WORLD therefore does everything it can to look like a video game shouldn't come as a shock. Defeated enemies scatter coins like Sonic scatters rings, there are popup screens and scores and even an extra life that comes in handy towards the end. There are even magic doors.

OK, so films don't have to tell a 'real' story to be great and they don't have to make any sense either (anyone who's seen LAST YEAR IN MARIENBAD will attest to that), but is this a trend? AVATAR looked like a videogame and was certainly more interested in putting pretty pictures on the screen than having a plot or acting and stuff. TRANSFORMERS 2 had big robots hitting other big robots and...er...nothing else. SPEED RACER was nothing but flashy visuals. CLASH OF THE TITANS was an empty CGI-fuelled experience.

Fortunately, I don't think this trend is going to go damage cinema too much. There have always been films that look better than the content they are filled with. Right now, though, there are films that are as good in terms of plot and character as they are in visual quality. Think back to last year's MOON, which was all about plot and character. This year's biggest hit has been INCEPTION which has a startlingly good plot for such a huge blockbuster and the animated likes of TOY STORY 3 and HOW TO TRAIN YOUR DRAGON have shown that even a kids' movie can max out on plot and contain good characters. KICK ASS shows that a plot can still be good whilst being matched to a great visual sense.

So let's just sit back and enjoy the hybrid experience that is SCOTT PILGRIM vs THE WORLD (because it is a really good night out) and not worry about the future of science fiction in the cinema. There will always be the empty eye-candy, but the good plot and likeable character is making a comeback.

Moon
Inception [Blu-ray]
How to Train Your Dragon (Two-Disc Blu-ray/DVD Combo + Dragon Double Pack) [Blu-ray]
Toy Story 3 [Blu-ray]

Shyamalan-bashing to become Olympic Sport?

Do you remember (it might even have been September) the first time that you saw THE SIXTH SENSE and were utterly blown away by this film from a director was clearly something of a genius?

How times have changed. With the release of M Night Shyamalan's THE LAST AIRBENDER garnering the kind of critical abuse unprecedented by even his standards we have to ask where it all went wrong and why the man considered most likely to succeed is now Hollywood's favourite pinata replacement.

Nobody likes a smart arse and Mr Shyamalan has never been backward in coming forward and telling everyone what a genius he is. In THE LADY IN THE WATER he cast himself as the man whose writing would save the whole of humanity! When he burst on the scene with the hugely successful SIXTH SENSE then he would have put a lot of more established noses out of joint, but it was a brillliant film. After all, he wrote, produced and directed it all himself. What a (talented) git!

Then came UNBREAKABLE, also starring Bruce Willis and another tricksy tale that proves to be a smart comic book origin story with another nice twist. THE VILLAGE was nicely put together with some scary moments, but it suffered from a twist that made it all a bit silly in retrospect and SIGNS was also a bit silly, but it was creepy too and had some major good jumpy bits.

Then came THE LADY IN THE WATER and the downward spiral began. This was Shyamalan's most personal project, based on a story that he told his kids, according to the hype. That's all well and good, but a bedtime story isn't necessarily what you want to base a film on and this film appealed neither to adults nor to kids. It was probably well received in the Shyamalan household, though. This was the film where everyone suddenly felt safe venting their envy and the bashing began.

It was THE HAPPENING, though, that took the sport of Shyamalan bashing to stellar levels. Sure, it was not a great film. It wasn't even a good film, but it had some supremely creepy moments at the start and some good jump moments in it as well. There were much worse films that the critics could have taken their spleens out to wipe all over, but it was Shyamalan and so it got far worse than it deserved. After all, the man who made THE SIXTH SENSE is capable of so much better.

And so we come to THE LAST AIRBENDER, which has had some gleeful savaging. We've not seen it, but feel confident that it's not as bad as everyone seems to think. It's a kids' movie and it doesn't seem to be being reviewed in that spirit.

M Night Shyamalan is the cinematic whipping boy of the moment. He needs to quit writing, directing and producing his own films and either write films for someone else or direct films that someone else has written. That way, he can't take all the blame himself.


M. Night Shyamalan Vista Series Collection (The Sixth Sense/Signs/Unbreakable)

AVATAR back for more of your money

Yes, AVATAR makes it way back to the big screen in an attempt to snaffle more of your hard-earned cash and the excuse for this is a whacking great 8 minutes (yes, 8 minutes) of new footage.

Now 8 minutes sounds like quite a lot, but consider that the film originally ran to 162 minutes which means that there will be a whole 5% more to see. Are you actually even going to notice that since it is presumably not going to be one new 8 minute sequence? And don't forget that James Cameron thought that these 8 minutes weren't even worth being in the original movie. It's unlikely to be some recently recovered footage of the actors delivering hitherto unnoticed oscar-worthy performances is it?

This brings us to the whole issue of 'Director's Cuts'. Now where a film has been messed up by a studio or has been restored with recently discovered footage then we have no issue with putting out the new version. The recent BLADE RUNNER boxset came with 5 different versions of the one film and we went ahead and bought that anyway. But when a film comes out with the director's vision intact and then is re-released with a chunk of stuff that he didn't want to put in first time around then that's called profiteering.

Enhancing the experience for a new medium is also something that we don't have a problem with. When you're sat at home and can pause the DVD to nip upstairs to the loo or make a cup of tea then the extended versions of THE LORD OF THE RINGS are an entirely different proposition than being stuck in your cinema seat with your legs crossed not wanting to miss a thing.

So, why do we have a problem with AVATAR being re-released into the cinema? Well, we don't in principle. Some films ought to be re-released and we have loved big screen showings of THE WIZARD OF OZ, IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE, DOUGALL AND THE BLUE MOON CAT, ET THE EXTRA TERRESTRIAL, IT CAME FROM OUTER SPACE and many others which we had only ever seen on TV or hadn't seen on the big screen for a long time. The cinema is the only place to see these films in their full glory, but they were brought back in their original form with no pathetic excuses about adding in extra bits. If you want to go back to Pandora and see AVATAR on a big screen with 3D glasses on to witness again the wonder, scale and epic beauty of the computer generated vistas then that's fine, but don't be lured back by the promise of 8 minutes of new stuff just tacked on for that very purpose.